Sickness

I was not feeling well yesterday. When cik HB woke me up for Subuh prayer, and I opened my eyes, I saw everything spinning and had this nausea feeling. And I couldnt even stand properly, it felt like I was going to fall down. I spent the whole day lying down and made frequent visit to the toilet -vomit! Couldn't even open my eyes coz everytime I opened my eyes, I saw the whole things spinning. Luckily cik HB was able to stay at home though he was planning to go to school. So he took over the houseworks and handling the kids.

Yep, I know when I mentioned I had this nausea and spinning stuffs, the first question was: am I pregnant? But knowing my body, it could also be a pre-menstrual symptom (which happens sometime). And based on the history, it could also be due to high blood pressure (I used to have this problem while I was working back then)

So what if I'm pregnant?

Well, to be honest, we don't plan for a new baby yet until cik HB is done with his study here. Considering my past experience being pregnant with the twins, it wasn't a smooth sail. The most difficult part was the first 4 months which I had a severe morning sickness condition called hyperemesis gravidum. I was in and out of hospital due to that condition and was practically doing nothing at home but lying down and tending my own misery.

People said it is not necessary that every pregnancy will have the same conditions or experiences but my eldest sister suffered this hyperemesis gravidum for all her 4 pregnancies. Luckily she lives nearby my parents' house, so they can help her out with the kids when she was going through the sickness. So that is why I think, it could happen to me as well.

Considering this factor, that is the reason why we think we should wait until we are back in Malaysia. Because if I were to be pregnant and going through the same situation again, things are going to be very challenging. With cik HB has to be in school most of the days and busy with assignments and exams, my main concern is the twins' wellcare. The first pregnancy was ok because I have nobody to worry about (cik HB is an adult so he can take care himself). Even yesterday, while I was lying sick, they still came to me, demanding things.

But we all know no matter how hard we plan, everything is in the hand of Allah sw.t. Like my sister-in-law, she had IUD planted in her womb, and yet she got pregnant! Because IUD only guarantee the effectiveness of 99%. Nothing is perfect in human being's design. So if I'm pregnant, we will accept it and just face whatever difficulties there.

Well, today I woke up feeling better then yesterday and there is no note of nausea feeling or whatever. So let's just wait another week before I should do a pregnancy test. And I think I should get myself the blood pressure reading meter to monitor the BP. As HBP runs in my family, I should be alert, shouldn't I?