Babysitter - Part 3

I don't deny that under Kak K's care, there were events of the twins jatuh-jatuh, but Kak K was transparent about it. If they fell, she would tell us when we came to fecth them and apologized profusely. And I accepted that because honestly even under my care, the twins fell too. It's hard to ensure that a baby in the progress of growing up doesn't fall down. But of course, we have to make sure that the falling doesn't bring harm to them.

There was once were very unhappy.....

When the twins were just over 1 year old, Kak K took another toddler under her care. The boy was about to reach 2 years old at that time. Apparently, the parents were not happy with the previous babysitter because they suspected the babysitter's son kept hitting the boy. And Kak K took the boy because the boy's grandmother who was Kak K's husband's friend pleaded.

And things were not the same for me after that because I used to have Kak K exclusively caring for my twins. Mornings usually I would stay at Kak K's house about half an hour to chat with Kak K while breastfeeding but then now with another parents there (they were also normally lingered around), I felt segan-segan.

And then, the parents would always buy junk food for the boy to bribe him to stay with Kak K. He was normally threw tantrum when arrived at Kak K's house. The mother said he was probably traumatised because what had happened before. So the parents would buy him so much of junk foods to quiet him down. The problem here, when my twins saw those foods, they would want them too while I, on the other hand had tried hard enough avoiding junk food. It was also brought problem to Kak K because the twins and the boy were always fighting.

Then one day when we came to pick them up, we were surpised to see that one twin had so many scratchs on her face and the other twin had cut near her eyes. It was really a bad sight. Kak K cried while apolozing and explaining that the boy had first scratched one twin and when Kak K tended the scratched twin, he poked the other twin with something and hit near the eye. Kak K said she had taken the poked twin to the clinic (which right in front her house), and the doctor said everything was ok.

I gulped....I wanted to be angry but as Kak K cried, I didn't know what to say. Since I'm not the hot-tempered type, it saved me from saying anything bad. Seeing cik HB face also I knew he was angry too.

We were thinking : what if it was the eye that poked?

That night we were thinking about sending the twins to Kak K. I knew I couldn't really blame her, for things just happened the way it happened. But with the boy there, I was worried about my twins' safety.

The next day we still sent the twins to Kak K as we both couldn't take leave. And Kak K still apologized. It was sad to see her that way because she kept repeating she was worried we would no longer send the twins to her (which we had considered). She said she would rather give up the boy than loosing the twins.

The boy's parents also apologized to me that day.

Few days after that, the boy stopped coming to Kak K's house. And when I asked Kak K, she said the parents probably had hired maid. But I guess Kak K had mentioned to them that she didn't want to babysit the boy anymore.

So things back to normal.....

When the twins were 1 1/2 years old, cik HB got a job in Melaka and we had to move there. Cik HB said the only thing he regret about leaving KL is leaving a good babysitter like Kak K, and I agreed with that.

Even after we had moved, Kak K still called to ask about the twins from time to time. And when we have time, we would take the twins to visit her too. Kak K has the twins' framed photo (she took them to photo studio to be photographed!) inside her deco cabinet.

Before we came to Germany, we went to visit her and she was so happy to see the twins. Recently I called her and we talked a lot.

What I can conclude from this babysitter matter :

1. Not everybody is lucky to get a good babysitter, but if you have time and choices, check carefully on the babysitter's background or if possible get recommendation from the parents who have used the sitter's service.

2. Do spot check occasionally. Like coming to their house unannounced. But don't do it so often and obvious. They would be annoyed if you keep checking on them. It would ruin your relationship with the babysitter.

3. If you notice something amiss with the babysitter, don't hesitate to stop sending your baby to her.Quickly find another alternatives for childcare.

4. Provide complete baby's necessities to the babysitter. Don't expect they buy your baby's stuff from the money that you pay for their service. Unless if you are giving more and you ask for her help to buy, then it would be different matter.

5. If you are afraid that the babysitter would be calculative one day, try not to let her cook or wash clothes for your baby.

6. As an employee, apart from salary, we always expect that our employer would give us bonus or some gratification for the work that we have done, so same goes with babysitter. It may not be in terms of money, but you probably can give present or treat her with her family with nice dinner or something to show that you appreciate her taking care your baby.

Well, I don't know how is it going to be if I would go back working and have more children. Whether I would get a good babysitter next time or I would resorted having maid, I couldn't tell.

But what happened to Baby Zulaiqha is indeed a sad tragedy. To Zulaiqha parents, I hope you both are strong and redha with what happened. And may all the truth about her death will come to surface.